Prior to Precipitation of Pretension, a Preemptive Post.

I am called pretentious. Far too much. And it annoys me. If I was actually being pretentious then fair enough, I could take it on the chin but I don’t think people know what the word really means and merely level the insult at me prematurely, if not entirely incorrectly. Oxford dictionary defines pretension as;

pretentious: adjective

attempting to impress by affecting greater importance, talent, culture, etc., than is actually possessed : a pretentious literary device.

In summation this literally means ‘to pretend’. Now when people call me pretentious it is normally because I am reading/writing poetry, listening to Jazz music, watching a foreign film or going to a gallery/art exhibit. I am not PRETENDING to like these things, I actually like them, nor affecting greater culture, nor am I trying to impress anyone, I normally do these things alone or in the privacy of my own home and don’t tell anyone because otherwise I’ll be called pretentious. If you’re going to insult me FINE but at least do it correctly for crying out loud. ‘Know-it-all’; Yes. ‘Snob’; very likely. ‘Old Man’; fair enough. ‘Smart-arse’; Not really but okay. ‘Ponce’; No (same as pretentious really). ‘Holier-than-thou’; I don’t think I am but I could understand if you did say that. ‘Arrogant, abusive, waste-of-space’; You are my ex-Girlfriend and shouldn’t be reading this blog anyway. But for christ sake I AM NOT PRETENTIOUS you ignorant ‘tards. I am not pretending to be smarter or showing off by reading poetry or liking Jazz or looking at Art, these things are horribly un-cool and have made me no smarter. I never went to University and have failed every exam I have ever taken. Not only that, as most people know, I also like Star Wars, Chocolate Buttons, Warner Brothers Cartoons, children’s Books, IMAX films and McFly.

People mistake the word pretentious for ‘Joe Cool’ or, more often than not, a derogatory term for being ‘Smart’. The people who call me it do so because I like things they don’t like that are seen as intellectual or ‘higher-culture’. Personally I think it is a sad indictment of our times that some of the things I like are viewed in this way. I am not sneering or looking down on anyone I am enjoying some things I really love on my own, in my own way and I rarely try to inflict them on other people.

Until now…

In the coming week I shall be doing something that will cause everyone to call me pretentious so this is a preemptive post to show I have at least tried to address this matter. I state now I am not doing it to “affect greater importance, talent or culture” or just faking it to look cool or intelligent which is what pretentious means, I am doing it because I want to and I actually enjoy it.

I very much doubt this will have any effect but at least I tried. Speak to you soon.


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